Healthy Skin

Your skin is the largest organ of your body. I could talk about how healthy skin starts from the inside out, blah, blah, infinity. But I won't because what you eat is your business. And the more I observe, the more I realize that one man's life-nourishing food is another man's poison. I'm no nutritionist.

Summer is approaching and so is the desire for soft, supple, smooth, unblemished skin. You can walk into any store and just grab a bottle of lotion, body oil, body butter, etc. 


Problem is most of those products are so chin-deep in chemicals that for someone like me with sensitive skin, it's not worth it. I'm better using nothing and drinking a lot of water in the hopes that will sufficiently hydrate my skin. 

But then I discovered virgin coconut oil. Does this sound like an infomercial yet? Some people swear by olive oil or jojoba or sesame or any other number of natural oils. If what you're using works, no need to fix what isn't broken.


None of those others worked for me. Like I said, REALLY sensitive skin here. So I tried coconut oil and it softens my skin beautifully without causing breakouts or flare ups. It's gentle enough to use on my face and it feels soooo soothing. It's solid in cooler temperatures (some say they actually whip it although I've never tried that) and liquid in warmer temperatures. I scoop out a small amount with a clean spoon to avoid contamination. A little goes a long way. I've even added a small amount to my shampoo or conditioner. 

You'll have baby soft skin without all the chemicals. Now I'm off to find a natural sunscreen that my skin won't rebel against. Maybe I'll just wear big floppy hats and huge sundresses :-) 

Healthy Race Perceptions

I woke up thinking about this topic today and just had to share.

Unless you've lived in a very small area where everyone just accepts everyone else (if this place exists, please enlighten me), you might know that racial tension is an issue not only in the U.S. but just about anywhere that humans inhabit the earth. It's just another way that people can successfully divide one another into categories, therefore fulfilling their desire to feel that they are better than someone else or to belong to an exclusive "club".

Some of my earliest and best memories were hanging out with my cousins whose father happened to be Chinese from the island of Borneo. I loved them and thought they were fun to play with. Complete and total acceptance. My kid brain was completely unaware that some people think it's acceptable or even expected behavior to classify a fellow human being in a negative way based on the how they look. 

Another of my earliest memories was going to Disneyland. Every time, my mom loved the It's a Small World ride. (I later discovered that this was mostly because it gave her the opportunity to sit down for a little while in a cool place), but for those of you who aren't familiar with the ride, it's basically a journey through the world...complete with automaton dolls who share songs, customs and dress from countries all over the world. It's a great way to teach young kids (and adults) that people are people everywhere and that different is cool. 

After living in Los Angeles till I was 13, my dad's job moved us to Northern Kentucky/Cincinnati area. Complete culture shock. We settled on the northern Kentucky side of the river due to housing cost, etc. and I wandered around searching for the melting pot that I was used to. It didn't exist. And then there was the river. The Great Divide. I observed that some Caucasians were afraid to cross the river onto the Ohio side and some African Americans refused to cross onto the Kentucky side. A light dusting of other races was represented. And racism was rampant. I heard things I didn't understand and didn't like. 

Then I moved to Georgia. I love Atlanta so much, I'm going back for more.  But like any southern city, it definitely has racial tension and issues. I remember this day when I was working in Buckhead at a massage place that I won't name. The owner and her administrative assistant who were both openly racist against black people behind closed doors (if that makes sense), said the local post office was giving them grief about something. The reason I mention race here is that it was an issue to them in this particular situation-this particular African American male employee was allegedly giving them trouble and wouldn't help them with their request. So they sent me. I didn't know what to think about that but I wanted to keep my job so I went. When I walked in the post office, despite what they had told me about him, I decided to form my own objective opinion. What I saw was a friendly enough guy just doing the best he could working a pretty thankless job day after day, probably dealing with a bunch of upper class, entitled (and in some case, racist) individuals. He knew where I was from (I was wearing a t-shirt with the company name on it). Despite his earlier experiences, he treated me like he hadn't already heard the same request twice that day. I was polite and respectful. So was he. I got service with a smile, no issues, no problems.

The reason I shared this story is because I believe others DO pick up on our vibes just as we do on theirs. Humans can sense perceptions, can correctly assess body language, even unconsciously. How we feel about a person or a group of people will come out sooner or later, even if we think we've buried it deep enough to get by in polite society. I catch myself sometimes, dividing people into groups or assuming that they will behave a certain way based on my pre-conceived notions. When I find myself doing this, I stop and say, wait! What do I know about this particular individual? And if the answer is "not much" then it's time to get to know him/her as a person, not as some part of a larger whole.

Let's talk about you

Everybody is a little bit crazy sometimes. True

This is okay. True.

If you love someone, you should just accept all of their crazy behavior because that's unconditional love. False.

I'm really tolerant of bizarre yet harmless habits, like those insane writers who change their font type all the time for no apparent reason. Because stuff like that doesn't matter. It's not hurting anyone. It might cause you to cuss under your breath if you're the kind who clings to order and symmetry, but it won't cause an accident (if you're reading your smart phone in traffic, that's no concern of mine). 

However, when behavior is hurting you, then it's perfectly okay, even necessary to step up and say something. If your neighbor eats 10 donuts for breakfast every morning on their front porch, chances are they know they shouldn't be doing that but they haven't found a way to stop and unless they ask for help, it's not your business. But if they keep trying to force those donuts down your throat when you're trying really hard to lose weight, if they shove the donuts in your face during your morning jog, then they've crossed the line. Feel free to beat them down.  [I didn't say that, I never advocate physical violence].


I've decided to start a series of blogs based on taking care of YOU. Whoever you are.  I mean, I don't know you, right? But that's the first thing I'm going to talk about: How you can listen to what YOU need, not what everyone else says you need (disclaimer: if you have a true addiction, you probably should listen to those who urge you to get help).  
When it comes down to it, the only person who can change you IS you.  Which pretty much nulls and voids not only this post but any subsequent posts. I should just shut up and let you work it out for yourself. Cuz I'm sure you are capable of doing just that. But since I love to give un-asked for advice and since I love to entertain try too hard to please the crowd in a very cheesy way, you'll probably see another post soon with my name on it.

Inexpensive Healthy Remedies

These are some natural remedies that I have used successfully...

Pepper stops bleeding. Yes, it really does (as long as you're not gushing blood). It also disinfects. It stings a little.

I sometimes cleanse my face with fresh lime juice, leave it on a few minutes and wash off. It makes my skin glow, brightens and actually cleans without drying the way commercial cleansers do. Be careful around cuts or broken skin (while it kills germs, the sensation will not be pleasant). Don't go out in the sun immediately after. It can have a lightening affect which is good if you want to get rid of red patches or blotches, bad if you're already pale as Casper. Please do a skin patch test first or dilute with water.

I recently got rid of a cold in 3 days. I owe it to Emergen-C and Lime Ginger Tea. If you need the recipe for the tea, just ask me. Emergen-C can be found in health food stores and even some Wal-Marts and drugstores.

Speaking of tea (regular, white, black, green)...it has anti-inflammatory properties. So you can drink it to ease fluid retention or put tea bags on your eyelids to reduce puffiness. For the sake of your heart and nerves, try to choose decaffeinated versions as much as possible. And don't load it up with sugar. Instead, use some honey and/or lemon juice for flavor. Honey is calming and won't spike your blood sugar.

Consider MSM (an organic sulfur compound) which can help those with arthritic and joint pain. My mom takes it for allergies and has noticed a great improvement. I take it for joint pain. And I've also noticed that when I combine it with my Calcium/Magnesium/VitaminD supplement at bedtime, I am able to relax and fall asleep quicker (as with any supplement or meds, buy from a reputable source and follow the instructions on the bottle).

For those of you who like cookies for breakfast or have low blood sugar, add almond butter, peanut butter or nuts to your favorite cookie recipe. You'll still satisfy your craving but with added protein and flavor.

The best thing for healthy skin is not external lotions or oils. It's hydration, plenty of internal good oils like olive oil, and omega 3 fatty acids and exercise...and massage! Had to throw that in :-) Drinking plenty of pure water, walking/massage (anything that promotes circulation and flushes out toxins, and consumption of good oils. Olive oil, jojoba oil and vegetable glycerin can be applied topically, especially during winter months when the cold air has such a wicked drying effect. Just remember not to block your pores with too much oil. Pores are there for a reason.

A tablespoon or 2 of apple cider vinegar in about 8 oz of water makes a great hair conditioner. Leave it on for a couple minutes and don't forget to wash off with lukewarm water unless you want to smell like vinegar all day. Not only does it soften, strengthen and fight dandruff...but at least with my hair, it makes it easier to de-tangle.

That's all for now. Stay tuned for more...

Crossroads

It's been over 2 yrs. I came to Atlanta in November of 2007, just before the ugly claws of the recession began to grasp and shred everyone in its path. I had a dream...to be a massage therapist. I was already licensed but Cincinnati/Northern Kentucky was not providing job opportunities for that profession. Besides, I wanted adventure.

You know how it is when you're a kid and adventure is a good thing? Well, this has been an adventure of a lifetime, perhaps not as fun as I'd imagined. I have watched a client succumb to cancer, had my first real boyfriend, been ripped off by a roommate, dealt with multiple unprofessional massage employers, all while struggling to maintain some type of financial balance. I've moved 3 times in 2 years and learned how to stretch a dollar from here to Texas. I had good credit before I moved here, I always paid bills on time and always had a little left over. But income loss will destroy even the most money savvy individuals on the planet.

I discovered some incredible things about myself...that I really am as stubborn and feisty as my family always said I was...that I'm multi-talented, even when some of those talents are not the kind that are readily appreciated. Like listening to friends on the phone, helping them feel better when I'm not sure how I'm going to pay rent and have barely enough to eat. That I really do enjoy simple things like listening to rain, a perfect cup of hot tea and a warm bath. I am a great massage therapist but, on this journey, I have realized that the scoliosis (spinal curvature) I have is going to limit my days in this profession. I've already worked through it many times when I was in a lot of pain. I can't keep doing it or I will self-destruct.

As is sometimes the case with personal quests, I came to Atlanta for massage and I'm now pursuing something else. Showbiz...I had let go of those dreams because I felt they were unrealistic. It occurred to me only a moment ago, that the most fun I think I ever had was when I was an actress/singer/dancer at the Ohio Renaissance Faire. (funny side note: I notice that I'm like the only female I know who refers to myself as an "actress" rather than "actor"...I don't know what this means other than the fact that I consider myself a lady ;-P). Screenwriting is not something I ever considered until my ex brought me to a meeting. The spark was created and now I have a screenwriting partner. We are working on multiple scripts with actual goals. Will I get rich from it? Perhaps in time...or maybe never. But the fires of passion have been rekindled. How many of you have had a moment when you realize that, while you are good at many things, there is something you were actually born to do? There's a distinct difference. And that I don't even care if I'm not the best at it, because I enjoy it. That something might not be your day job or your income generating solution, but you have a passion for it like no other.

Unfortunately, I might have to leave Atlanta. Because passion or no, I can't continue to work as a massage therapist much longer...I can feel it. I have great arm muscles ;-) but the rest of my body is suffering. And I can't generate enough income from it to be able to take care of myself properly and pay my bills. I have been searching for other work in Atlanta for over a year...part time, full time. It's not a good market and I'm trying to essentially switch careers which doesn't help. I am so very very grateful to my family and friends who have been there for me, good advice or just listening because they knew it would do no good to try to talk sense into me.

Where will I go? I don't know, because technically I would need a job wherever I decide to go. I can't just "go home". I don't know where home is but Atlanta is the closest thing I have to home right now. My family is in Baltimore, Northern Ky, Los Angeles and more. I guess you could say I spent the most time in Northern KY/Cincinnati area. For those of you that don't know, I lived 13 yrs in L.A., Dad's job transferred to Cincinnati where I spent next 14 yrs and then I moved to Atlanta. But most of my family isn't even in Cincinnati anymore due to my Dad moving for work once again. I feel like a nomad. Maybe that's why I like it here...because I am surrounded by many people who are also from other places and it makes me feel less strange.

So perhaps it makes the most sense to find a way to stay in ATL. Only problem is that my energy is drained. I'm reaching deep within myself and coming up empty. My family went through so much before I even came here (including vision loss for 2 of my brothers--->Leber's hereditary optic neuropathy). Then, after everything I've dealt with here, I think my stamina is gone. I can't focus on anything, I'm in a slump. I'm usually pretty good at bouncing back from stressful situations but right now I feel like silly putty that dried out.

Midnight Snack

There's rules for everything, right...don't cross the street until you get the signal (unless you're in NYC), don't take candy from strangers and don't eat rich foods after 8pm. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, my Mama taught me well. I still don't take candy from strangers...

So tonight I was craving chocolate chip cookies but I didn't have any eggs or wheat flour. It was late and raining and I just was not going to the store. After trying a few google searches, I found a recipe without eggs. It did call for wheat flour but I substituted rice flour since that's all I had...and also because every time I eat something with wheat in it, my allergic reaction tends to be worse. And I shouldn't keep playing with that or I'll end up with anaphylactic shock or something bad.

I used real butter, brown sugar, vanilla. No imitation stuff for me. I'd love it if I had a farm right down the road where I could get everything fresh. I was skeptical but pleasantly surprised. The cookies were scrumptious...golden brown, crumbly, moist, rich, flaky, and of course I ate them while they were still warm accompanied by Lactaid. It's funny, I saw someone in a grocery store tell someone else to put the Lactaid back (guess they weren't lactose intolerant) because it tastes bad. I haven't noticed. Tastes like milk to me.

Here is the recipe if you are ever in the mood for cookies and realize you have no eggs. I left out the oats and raisins. It's the kind of thing you can play with. Maybe next time I'll also add pecans. http://www.recipezaar.com/Oatmeal-Chocolate-Chip-Cookies-No-Eggs-3954

30

Plans for my 30 yr old birthday included Vegas or a white sand beach somewhere warm with palm trees and margaritas complete with the little umbrellas. That was fantasy. Reality found me walking 3 miles to pick up my car from the mechanic because it hadn't passed the emissions inspection which is a necessary part of tag renewal in Cobb County Georgia. The mechanic shop would have sent someone to pick me up and bring me to my vehicle...and I'm sure I could have gotten a ride from a friend if I had really wanted one. But it is a gloriously beautiful day in Atlanta...blue sky, sunshine, slight breeze, not too hot or too cold. If it wasn't for the exhaust fumes I swallowed on my trek, it would have almost felt like that tropical island of my dreams. I think I now understand why my Grandma (God rest her soul) refused to stop taking her daily walks on the streets of Los Angeles even after she was mugged. There is something about walking that renews the body and revives the spirit.

I grabbed some green tea and cookies on the way. My peaceful inner silence was sometimes broken by the honks of male drivers who apparently appreciated what they were seeing. If there's one thing I've learned in 30 years, it's that males will always find females attractive. They could be wearing burlap sacks or covered completely from head to toe, it wouldn't matter.

No major mishaps. Well, there was the guy who stopped briefly to ask me if I was going far and needed a ride. I said: "I'm good, thanks," barely pausing to glance in his direction and thinking that he slightly resembled the stereotypical 40+, balding, white guy who has a secret habit of kidnapping women and doing dreadful, unspeakable things to them before their bodies are discovered in his basement ten years later. (Yes, I made the unfortunate mistake of watching Law & Order SVU last night). Regardless, I don't get into strangers cars, female or male. End of subject...except for that time in Cleveland TN (which I can totally explain some other time).

And there were the dogs. As I passed, they crawled underneath the fence of the auto body shop they were guarding. I had fleeting visions of being surrounded and torn to pieces by savage watch dogs. My fears were quickly replaced by the wagging tails and friendly faces of Golden Retrievers and Irish Setters. The purebred Doberman Pinscher, that must certainly be lurking in the shadows, behind some rusted out fender, never materialized. Instead, my new canine friends were following me on my journey. Not that I minded, but I wasn't sure how the mechanic would feel about someone coming to get their vehicle accompanied by a pack of dogs. So I tossed them the empty tea can and cookie wrapper. Dogs are easily distracted.

I wanted to linger along the unused portion of the railroad tracks. I wanted to sit and write a story about the house by the tracks, the people they had seen. Good times, bad times. History has rattled by on those tracks, never stopping. Always tirelessly chugging on.

Amazingly enough, I wasn't even tired when I reached the shop. The shop owner's wife rang up my transaction while asking me where Boone county (where I bought the car) was in Kentucky because she had been born in Paducah. And then the conversation drifted to the good relationship she has with her daughter (who called while I was there) and her mother....and her brother and... It had that sort of homey, relaxed feel. Something that I have found in Kentucky and the South both. I wouldn't have been a bit surprised if she had offered me some sweet tea and an invitation to dinner.

The drive home was completely uneventful and boring. Somehow I don't crave Vegas or my mini island now. Perhaps some of the best moments in life are unplanned.